Tomorrow Bryan + I will have been married for 5 months (I know a lifetime, right ;) While I'd love to show you some beautiful photos and tell you how amazing life is, I thought it would be more revealing if I would be honest about the last 5 months in the hope that it would help someone reading this...
As I looked into that amazing little makeup mirror that my husband so observantly saw me admire in a recent hotel stay, little did I know that he ordered it that same weekend, and installed it before another week would pass. Maybe it was the 10x magnification, or maybe it was that handy little LED light, but I didn't like the wife that looked back at me.
What I saw was a wife who has spent the last 5 months trying to be so generous + giving to literally EVERYONE other than her husband.
I saw a wife who let every custody battle, every travel schedule, and every sick child take scheduling priority over her own husband.
I saw a wife who has cooked less than 1% of the meals we've eaten together. More nights than not I haven’t been as patient as I would expect him to be toward me. My dogs have picked up interesting habits due to the piling loads of laundry; just the other day I found a pair of socks far from the pile in which they originated.
I saw a wife who has taken TWO weekends off from work since returning from our honeymoon in June + I'm pretty sure I found a way to sneak in some emails and edits during those weekends too.
In short, I saw a wife I wasn't proud of.
Ouch.
This recount may sound like an overreaction or it may even sound a little callous + I don't mean it to be. Bryan and I’ve had many laughs and good times in the last 5 months - there's not a place in the world I'd rather be than with him... yet I haven't been there.
I love my husband more than anything in the world + I can't say enough about how perfectly he loves me. So I wanted to take this moment as the perfect opportunity to reflect on my life, our life. Our life now… and how I want it to be in the future.
My uncle shared a quote yesterday "The problem is we think we have time" - Buddha and it summed up the last 5 months for me. I've been so busy working + focusing my attention on other things that I've ignored the man I MARRIED. I've lived like he will always be there. I've lived like I have all the time in the world to do it all. I’ve taken things for granted. Life is precious and can change instantly and forever without as much as a hint or a whisper.
So as I prepare to take off some time from shooting {Starting November 19th} + learn how to BE A WIFE, I hope this encourages you to say NO to the unending demands that each day presents and say YES to what is truly important in your life.
#ItMatters
